The Knowing and Showing of Discipleship

Today’s article is the second installment in our series Discipling our Children.

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The statistics I shared in the first blog post of this series on Christian students leaving the faith after graduating and moving out of their parents’ home is disheartening.  As parents we must model the importance of God, the Bible, relationship with Jesus and faith in our own lives in order to influence our children.  We must help our children to know Jesus is our priority and  show them how to prioritize Him.  

This is so convicting to me because I know that I am not always modeling this behavior myself.  Recently, I realized that time has gone by so fast and now my children only have four to six more years at home before we send them out into the world.  Y’all, this is motivation for my husband and I to get it together and map out  intentional plans to help our kids KNOW who their priority is.  In addition to us SHOWing these imports.  

KNOW:  Ever since our family started homeschooling, friends have reached out inquiring about how we homeschool, where to start, what curriculum to buy, and so many other questions. My advice is always the same. The first thing I share is this:  know what your end goals are, then work backwards from there. Here’s what I mean and what I break down to my friends when we have this conversation, but they don’t just apply to homeschooling, they apply to so much more.  

We must identify the answers to these important questions:

1. What are the priorities/knowledge you want to instill before sending your child out into the world without you always being there?  
2.  Of these priorities what is the MOST important thing you hope to develop before your child leaves your home?

After identifying these, find ways to shape your lives around that goal to work towards meeting it.  

Our family goals/priorities are the following: to be a functional human in the world, to be educated and knowledgeable in subjects, to have hobbies, to be contributing members to society and understand the Bible and have a relationship with Jesus.  Our priority and top goal is the last one: To understand the Bible and have a relationship with Jesus before leaving our house.  

From establishing that priority, we develop our lives, curriculum, and family ways around that goal.  As I mentioned, you don’t have to be a homeschool parent to adopt this principle it’s just my advice when people start homeschooling to help them pump the brakes and remember what is most important to their family.  

If you are a professing Christian, I’d venture to say Jesus is the most important in your family; and if He’s not, there needs to be some reprioritizing happening.  For the Butler family, we want to make Jesus the center of our lives so that our children have a Biblical worldview (more on this later) and put Him first.  We also try to share with our children, in as many ways possible, that Jesus is the most important.  We literally tell them He is our priority.  So, what can living this out look like?  

SHOW:  It looks like attending church over sleeping-in, reading the Bible over watching TV, praying instead of venting, making time for the Word instead of the world.  One simple way to get started is to sit down as a family and share, “from here on out we are going to show one another that God is the most important person in our lives and our relationship with Him will trump everything.”    

Now, because I’m all about practicality here are some of those practical ideas to showing your family that you’ve made Jesus a priority:

• Wake-up each morning and have quiet time reading your Bible or praying, modeling this behavior for the family.  If they come and interrupt, share that you’re “spending time with Jesus” and encourage them to go and do the same.  
• Have a morning prayer time with the family, and share that you want to start their day off with the best person in the world, the Lord.  
• Make Christian holidays about Jesus- have a Birthday party for Him on Christmas, tell the story of the resurrection on Easter.  Include gifts that point them back to God.  
• When you go on a family walk, find a family in your neighborhood to pray for together.  
• Choose Christ honoring media and acknowledge when something does not honor God.  
• Go to church and be involved.  
• Share the gospel with others and teach your children how to do it too.  
• Read the Bible.  Have children read their Bible before doing chores (showing that faith is priority over your work).  
• Acknowledge blessings and ask them “did you see what God just did in that?”  Make those blessings evident to them.

I know I’ve left off so many opportunities, but these are just a few.  Having your family know and show your priorities will eventually make them their priorities too in most cases.  Let’s flip those stats around friends and fight the good fight of faith with our kiddos.  Please share your ideas or ways your family can or will KNOW and SHOW Jesus! 

Blessings, Amanda

Questions to Consider

1. How are you currently teaching your children to KNOW who their priority is?
2. How are you as a parent SHOWing them He is the priority?
3. What are some ideas you have to further the KNOWING and SHOWING in your family?
4. What are the priorities/knowledge you want to instill before sending your child out into the world without you always being there?  
5.  Of these priorities what is the MOST important thing you hope to develop before your child leaves your home?